Please be
aware, there are spoilers in here!
On release day, I was eager to get to the cinema to watch Hansel and Gretel for a few reasons:
1) The trailer looked pretty damn cool
2) Jeremy Renner
3) Gemma Arteton
4) Hans Zimmer’s soundtrack
5) Amazing premise
6) Action and Violence!
Once
exiting the cinema, I spent time looking back at what I just watched. Questions
left completely unanswered and some poor decisions by the writers.
Firstly, why
on earth was it only in 3D in all of the VUE cinemas in my area! The 3D did
nothing to the story, did not create depth and was only used to keep the
viewers on their feet when something was thrown towards them which never
actually happened to me. It appears to me to be a fad only used to draw in
those die hard fans of 3D (which should probably re-evaluate their lives if that
is all they want) or to trap others into paying a few extra quid (or bucks to
you American readers!).
On the
bright side, Jeremy Renner (Hansel) was brilliant and fitted his role perfectly
but had a mysterious illness due to eating part of the candy house as a child,
which is never explained properly within the movie apart from a segment saying
he got it from eating a bit of candy. After investigating, it turned out to be diabetes
which would knock him to the floor within seconds if he didn’t have his
injection. Gemma Arteton (Gretel) on the other hand was very bad casting.
Personally I hoped she would fit it perfectly, however she was used as a sex
object throughout the movie and in the scenes that demanded an aggressive
attitude, and you couldn’t take her seriously. She lacked the aggression that
Michelle Rodriguez would have brought, being that she typically does action
rather than Gemma, which would have been a better choice for the director. Yet
she does have some good moments which make up for some of it. On the subject of
characters, the costume design was brilliant and make-up for the Black witches
was perfect for connoting their evil. While there was little (if any) character
development the violence made up for it. Especially in the last few fight
scenes that are filled to the brim with action.
The
locations for filming were very cramped. It is quite apparent that most of it
was filmed in a studio setting while the open woodland shots where full of
running, jumping and action which looked to have the main characters on their
ass most of the time. With an estimated budget of $50 million, you would
suspect they have enough to throw about (I’d like to have $50 million to throw
about on a movie like this)
While the
story is much the same as the character development, action was one of the
movies selling points. With instances of Tarantino’s blood splatters and
excessive violence, some appeared quite comical as if the movie was more
concerned with being fun and wacky rather than aiming for any Oscar nominations
for next year (which is probably best). Yet the killing of Renner’s love
interest was criminal. Why kill the woman who saved his life once and could
cure his diabetes and end the fairy tale with a fairytale ending! It seems to
be as a big F you to the audience, when you expose the best character plot it
is hugely damaging to the outcome of the film.
Overall,
the movie is average. It isn’t the best movie of 2013, never will be. However,
for a night out, it is good fun. As long as you are in for the fun aspect
rather than the story, you will enjoy it and is probably worth seeing it in
cinema (please avoid the plague of 3D).
I would be
inclined to rate this movie around about 6/10 mainly for all the problems
listed above but for some fun it would be a little higher!
