Film Review: Aladdin

"You Stumbled Upon An Opportunity. I Can Make You Rich. Rich Enough To Impress A Princess..."

Acting as the second Disney backed money making exercise of the year so far, with the likes of The Lion King and Lady and the Tramp still to come, Aladdin follows hotly in the footsteps of the critically trashed and solidified box office bomb, Dumbo, by once again "treating" audiences to a live-action "reimagining" of the 1992 animated classic of the same name which to many, is the ultimate Disney adventure thanks to its' outrageously memorable and Academy Award winning soundtrack and of course, the iconic dulcet tones of the late, great Robin Williams as Genie. With Aladdin circa 2019 therefore, the transition from animation to live action brings in the cinematic enigma that is Guy Ritchie (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) as director, a bold and overly baffling decision considering the Brit's recent back catalogue, and whilst sometimes such clashes bring forth works of brilliance, it comes at no surprise that Ritchie's take on the animated classic begs the question yet again of why such a remake is necessary in the first place, and whilst Aladdin does feature some interesting and well orchestrated set pieces, all the positive elements seem to be those cherry picked from the original to an uncanny exactness with the tacked on additions only damaging a picture which falls into the same category as Dumbo; absolutely pointless.

With an opening forty minute act which ranks almost as mind numbingly dull as that seen within Dumbo, the screenplay from Ritchie and John August (Dark Shadows, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) swiftly introduces us to the main players of the piece, with Mena Massoud (Jack Ryan) handed down the titular lead role as the kind hearted, street rat who soon falls deep in love with the glowing beauty of Naomi Scott's (Power Rangers) Princess Jasmine, and whilst Scott undoubtedly has talent to burn, singing voice and all, it's ironically Massoud who nearly sinks the ship completely, with his performance devoid of all charisma or charm and supported by a vocal capacity which challenges Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia! for worst contemporary evidence of on-screen karaoke. With the first act almost sending me to sleep, I almost resorted to prayer at the sight of Will Smith (Bad Boys, Independence Day) as he finally marks his appearance on the big screen, and whilst his own take on Genie is undoubtedly a cross between the Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Nicolas Cage after snorting contaminated cocaine in Mandy, the remaining eighty minutes seem to be no longer directed by Ritchie at all, with the film's choreographer instead enhancing the movie into a pretty fun ride, albeit one seen exactly before in the 1992 version, but with the noose already tightened and added inclusions which really don't work and only seek to stretch out the already tired runtime, Aladdin is fine but pointless and a remake which just happens to have Will Smith as the clear ace in the pack. 

Overall Score: 5/10

Film Review: King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

"I'm Not Getting Drawn Into This Mess! There's An Army Of You, There's Only One Of Me..!" 

Oh, Guy Ritchie. With a career which began with the promising flourish of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, the independently made British gangster flick which not only launched the career of everyone's favourite action star, Jason Statham, but was too a brilliantly audacious black comedy which included The Stone Roses on the soundtrack and Vinnie Jones as, well, Vinnie Jones, it seemed that ever since his much publicised mess of a marriage to Madonna, the "saviour" of all things cockney geezer went on an outstanding run of woeful cinematic failures, with the likes of Swept Away and Revolver being the two much maligned examples of Ritchie's failed promise. One divorce later and middling return to success with the Robert Downey Jr. led Sherlock Holmes movies, of which I can state to not being a massive fan of due to the success of the BBC led series at the time, Guy Ritchie returns once again to the limelight with yet another big-screen adaptation of the legend of King Arthur, utilising the skills of Sons of Anarchy and The Lost City of Z star, Charlie Hunnam, in the titular leading role in a movie which is as barmy and OTT as it is messy and overblown. Some would call it Snatch in kilts; who I am I to disagree?

After the death of both father and mother at the hands of Jude Law's power-hungry, megalomaniacal King Vortigern, Charlie Hunnam's Arthur Pendragon is raised from child to man in the heart of a slumber town brothel, taking ques from the criminal fraternity around him in order to build a reputation and presence of power with an ultimate goal of leaving for a better and more prosperous life. A touch of a sword and an god-awful David Beckham cameo later, the long lost King of Camelot is finally arisen, bringing with it ear-grating dialogue, stupidly dull action sequences and a swarm of yawn-inducing special effects which turns the latter half of the movie into some form of lifeless video game. Among these many issues, Ritchie's tenderness for the cockney geezer camaraderie is quite easily the worst element of the movie, with one scene in particular near the start of the movie in which our hero is forced to remember the day's events via flashback coming across as a somewhat Lock, Stock/Snatch parody sketch which literally left me draw-dropped at how misjudged and awfully ludicrous it seemed. Even with all these obvious issues, Legend of the Sword is the type of movie which although at times is trying to say the least, does offer a sense of "so bad its' good" in its' wacky sensibility which works in tandem with the campy hiss, boo performance of Jude Law as the film's main antagonist. Messy and narratively twisted, Ritchie's interpretation of the mighty King himself is a cinematic raspberry, but when put up against the likes of Unlocked and Sleepless recently, is a slightly enjoyable raspberry.

Overall Score: 5/10

Film Review: The Man From U.N.C.L.E

From Russia With Love

With gun's and gangster's auteur Guy Ritchie seemingly popping off the radar recently, even after the release of the two Robert Downey Jr. Sherlock Holmes films, which let's face it, were rather forgettable affairs in comparison to the much better BBC series, his decision to return with a cinematic release of the famous U.S television series The Man From U.N.C.L.E was a strange one to say the least. Yet after promising trailers and a superb cast including Man of Steel's Henry Cavill, The Social Network's Archie Hammer, and queen of 2015, Alicia Vikander who has starred in everything this year from Ex Machina to Seventh Son, Ritchie's latest cinematic offering was something I was rather excited for yet its' final product ultimately is something unfortunately much more forgettable with only rare flashes of brilliance in what can only be regarded as great idea not fulfilled to its' full potential. 

After news of a potential nuclear threat is made by business mogul and suspected criminal Victoria Vinciguerra (Elizabeth Debicki), American agent Napoleon Solo (Cavill) is tasked with teaming up with Russian agent Illya Kuryakin (Hammer) in order to combat the supposed threat, aided by Russian defector Gaby Teller whose missing father may or not be aiding such developments. With moments of sheer entertainment, particularly in regards to the banter-esque relationship between our two main heroes, and scenes of high comedic value, with the late torture scene coming first to mind, The Man From U.N.C.L.E shows signs of how Ritchie could have potentially found an overly winning formula for such a film, but is ultimately let down by an overly cliched plot, a shocking lack of overall threat, and a desire to retreat to flashbacks to spoon-feed details of the plot. A missed opportunity? Possibly, but for the time it was on, The Man From U.N.C.L.E was reasonably harmless, just not overly memorable. 

Overall Score: 6/10